Alice MunroWhy is there always this twitchiness, when you introduce a man to a woman friend, about whether the man will be bored or put off?
About This Quote
The words "bored" and "put off" can convey such negative connotations. What does it mean to be bored? Does the idea of being bored make you picture yourself as a loafer, drinking tea and watching television? Or is "bored" simply a synonym for "confused"? The concern about whether your companion will be bored is understandable. You fear that she might feel that you don't want her to come and that you just want to meet someone else. And that would be a real shame, because you want her to come and see you, and because she might enjoy the evening with you. When we introduce a man to a woman friend, we think of what we might say or do in such situations.
We want to seem friendly and not appear standoffish or unfriendly. We hope the man will enjoy himself and won't feel left out, so we avoid saying something like: "Let's go somewhere quiet where we can talk," or "Let's go out into the country," or "Let's go in for a drink," or "I'd like us to meet somewhere in town." We don't want him to feel that we're trying to shut him out. If we do mention going somewhere quiet, we hope he'll accept; if we mention going in for a drink, we hope he'll say yes; if we suggest meeting anywhere in town, we hope he'll say no. Instead, if he says yes, we may say: "Why don't I pick you up here at eight o'clock? That way you can easily get back home if necessary." Or perhaps: "I'll come round at eight o'clock on Saturday morning so that I can get back home before lunchtime." Then again: "Can I drop round on Sunday afternoon for an hour or two?" If there's no problem about going back home on Sunday afternoon, then saying: "Can I drop round on Tuesday evening?" is perfectly all right too. In any case there are plenty of other days when things can be arranged between us!
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